The birth of Violet Elizabeth

Here is the very overdue birth story of my little peanut, who is three months old today.

On Monday, December 17th, I had an OB appointment. At the appointment, my doctor did a cervical check and said that I was 2cm dilated already. We made the decision to induce at 39 weeks, which would have been Thursday the 20th. (Officially because I was a high-risk patient, for me the reason was really that I think it would totally suck to have a birthday really close to Christmas or between Christmas and New Year’s.)

On the way home, I felt a contraction and was like, wow. That was a REAL mothereffing contraction. I had a few more throughout the afternoon and cancelled my plans (I’d taken the afternoon off to get a pedicure and putter around the house) and laid in bed timing the contractions on an iPhone app. They continued but eased up enough that I went to sleep that night fine and didn’t think that I was necessarily in labor.

I woke up at 6am with contractions that were 5 minutes apart. I asked my husband to get Henry ready for school (at the time, that was my job) because I felt too horrible to do it. He took him in, and by the time he got back the contractions were all over the place – 5 minutes, then 12 minutes, then 7 minutes. We both decided to work from home that day.

(As an aside – I normally work from home really well. I get way more done at home than at work, because of the distractions. However, on this particular day, it was more “working from home.” I had a call with my manager at 4:15pm about the project I was wrapping up. The contractions were still all over the place.)

My contractions finally got to 5 minutes apart for an hour from 6-7pm, so we left for the hospital then. (In retrospect, I should have realized by how hard the contractions were that I was definitely in active labor, but I am such a rule follower that I refused to go until I hit the guideline.) We got there around 7:40, and then waited for a lady at the desk to finish up her paperwork while I dealt with three horrible contractions. They put me in a triage room – alone – no husband allowed – and the bitchface nurse hooked me up to a fetal monitor and left me there. I couldn’t move at all. When the very nice resident came in, she checked me and said I was at 7cm and it was now or never for an epidural. I said, NOW NOW NOW. Then they left me alone again, during which time the contractions were right on top each other and horrible. I literally screamed at the top of my lungs SOMEONE HELP ME PLEASE FUCK FUCK FUCK IT HURTS HELP ME.

(I felt bad about the screaming until I realized that I went through the part of labor that women hire doulas for and take 12 week classes to prepare for ALL BY MYSELF strapped to a bed, while not understanding what was happening.)

When the nurse came back, I told her that I felt like I needed to push and she said, “Don’t push. Breathe through your nose.” And she then she sauntered out. Then the resident came back, checked me, said I was fully dilated and we had to deliver now. I barely got to the delivery room (bitchface nurse: Do you want to walk? me: NO!) before I started pushing. My husband almost missed her birth sitting in the waiting room.

Everything after that in the hospital was great. The doctors were so nice and they made great changes in the recovery unit since the last time I was there. It was a really good experience once Violet was out of me! And it was really cool that I delivered her in exactly the same delivery room that I delivered Henry in (at exactly the same gestational age – with a 2 pound weight difference!).

The next day the OB called me in the hospital and told me that she had stripped my membranes during the cervical check. I was like, OHHHH. That explains the real contractions starting in the car on the way home. Yes it does.

We are doing great. A few general thoughts on life so far:

• I didn’t realize how emotionally I was impacted by hormones until Violet was out of me. Literally, it was like once she was out, the clouds parted. I had been so anxious and angry – and in the delivery room everything was suddenly better.
• Violet latched on immediately, and nursing her has been a breeze. It’s made me realize that maybe it wasn’t all my fault that Henry didn’t nurse. Not that it was HIS fault, seeing as how he was a BABY, but it takes two to tango I guess.
• Having two kids has been easier than having a toddler and a difficult pregnancy (so far).
• I went back to work last week and miss my peanut with a fiery passion. I feel sort of bad that I don’t miss Henry this much (though I did when HE was a baby). It’s probably because I spent maternity leave snuggling with Violet on the couch and nuzzling her head, while Henry’s new favorite thing to do is throw shit at me. But still, I feel bad.

Violet Elizabeth

 

She was born on 12/18, almost a month ago! We are doing great. I’ll try to post her birth story soon (spoiler alert: it was an unintentionally drug-free birth).

Hope anyone still reading is doing well!

Henry the bathtub pooper of doom

You would think this cute boy could never take a dump in the bathtub, right? Certainly not twice in a row? You would be wrong.

Things are good! I finished my first class in my graduate program and while I loved it, it’s nice to have some free time again. I am using it to get a lot of random things done (like buying Christmas presents) since my next class goes up until a few weeks from my due date.

Henry is great. He is either the happiest, cutest kid ever or a giant ball of inconsolable misery. There is not much in between. We are going on our second flight with him over Labor Day – very nervous but hoping for the best.

I’m 22 weeks now and effing enormous. Despite eating far better than last time, I’m right on track for another 55 pound gain. (Nine pounds in four weeks.) Oh well. As long as the baby is okay and I can lose it like last time, it’s totally fine, right?

Update, part 7

Everything looked good today except that my subchorionic hematoma is still there. I couldn’t see the screen (the patient screen was broken) so I don’t know the size, but she said it’s smaller. It was actually almost less stressful to not be able to see what she was doing. I just laid back and stared at the ceiling.

No verdict on the sex. The tech said she couldn’t tell for sure, so we think it’s a girl.

Thanks for the positive thoughts!

20 week ultrasound tomorrow, standard feelings of fear and doom

Super nervous for tomorrow but hoping all is well.

I have been terrible with blogging and keeping up with blogs. Its all good things – I got promoted at work and started a graduate program, and with taking care of Henry, I feel like I have no time that is unscheduled. I keep forgetting I’m pregnant. (Last time, I sat on the couch thinking I’m pregnant I’m pregnant I’m pregnant.)

Anyway, I’ll update tomorrow and hopefully catch up then!

Update, part 6

Mostly good news today. Most important – fetus not dead. Heart rate measured twice, once 173 and once in the 140s.

Stupid blood clot still there, but slightly smaller – 5.5cm by 2.5cm. She said it appears to be mostly old blood, not new bleeding, which is good.

Fetus’ measurements were anywhere from 16w0d to 15w0d. (She measured parts, not crown-rump). I was/am a little concerned about the smaller ones, as I’m almost 16 weeks, but I decided to just try to let this go for the next few weeks and not obsess. Hopefully that works out for me.

Overall, I feel better about things. Not awesome (how can you feel awesome while wearing a maxi pad? Regardless of whether or not you are pregnant) but okay enough to focus on other things.

Second trimester and still wearing a maxi pad doom

I think I am getting a diaper rash from 3.5 straight weeks of maxi pads.

I saw my doctor today. I wasn’t scheduled for an ultrasound, but I knew that she was going to want to do an ultrasound as The Bleeding Continues. I thought about calling last week and being like, dude, how about we just set this up now and get it over with at once because you know you’re going to order it, am I right? I thought that this suggestion would probably be met with an eye roll and “let’s just see, okay?”

And so I go back tomorrow and we’ll see what this stupid clot has been up to for the past three weeks, other than freaking me out. Last time it was 6.5 cm by 2.5 cm big (which is on the big side but not horribly enormous from what I gather).

I am also really worried about the fetus’ growth – he or she was suddenly a little behind last time. So nervous. I hate this.