Happy Thanksgiving! Merry Christmas! Happy New Year! I guess a lot has happened since the last time I posted. I’m having a hard time remembering the blog-worthy parts, so instead I will just tell you about my doctor’s appointment today.
I finally got my period back a few months ago (9 months postpartum), and my husband and I aren’t using any protection (except for the fact that we have an infant and my sex drive is in the crapper) so I decided I should get myself to my miscarriage doctor to get checked out. I went this morning and was unexpectedly depressed by it. You see, for the past few years I have had the following theory about my three miscarriages:
- Miscarriage #1: Happened at about 6 weeks. Was probably a chromosomal error.
- Miscarriage #2: Chemical. Also probably chromosomal error.
- Miscarriage #3: Fetal demise at 12 weeks. Normal chromosomes. Probably from chronic endometritis that I probably got in the D&C from miscarriage #1.
Except that today I found out that miscarriage #1, was, in fact, normal. (She had sent the tissue out for crazy high tech testing, but I had gotten pregnant with Henry and graduated to my OB before the results came back.) This is sort of rocking my worldview because what if there is something really wrong with me and Henry was just a fluke?
I know that I’m lucky to have him, and that if we just have him that will be A-OK. But I am stressed about starting to try again now, and my cavalier attitude of “it worked before, so it should work again!” is sort of in the crapper. Before today, I was sort of thinking I was not ready for another pregnancy and all the anxiety and stress that would come with it, not to mention the whole having both an infant and toddler to take care of thing. Now I feel like I need to get this show on the road.
The plan is to do an endometrial biopsy next month to see how my uterus is holding up in there, and then go from there.
